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How to Explain Surrogacy to a Child

Explaining the story of your child’s conception can be a difficult subject for many parents who have children born through surrogacy. It is normal to have feelings of discomfort or unease about how, or if, to approach the story of your child’s creation. You may be worried about how your child will react, feeling distant from your child, or watching them act out after disclosing the information. You may even be wondering if they will still consider you their “real” parent if they know the truth. 

At Family Creations, we believe that these are valid concerns, but we know that broaching the topic can be a positive experience for everyone. If you’re struggling with how to explain surrogacy to a child, read on here to learn more.

Why You Should Explain Surrogacy

Research has shown that waiting to tell your child the origins of their birth until later in life may cause them to act out more when compared to children who are told their unique birth story earlier on. At a young age, children have a much easier time accepting unusual things, especially when they’re told about them in a positive, relaxed way. Don’t worry about exactly how to explain surrogacy to your child, as long as you do.

Some Tips

We understand that telling your story is full of complexity and emotion. Just remember, there is no right or wrong way to tell the story. Just let it come naturally. Some of the top tips we recommend when considering how to explain surrogacy to a child include:

  • Keep it simple
  • Avoid complications
  • Don’t overthink

Kids appreciate simple, straight-to-the-point information. You don’t need to offer any more information than necessary, but if your kids start asking questions, be prepared with honest answers. If you don’t want to share a specific aspect of your situation, you can always tell them that you can chat about it another time because it is difficult for you to explain.

Most children will forget the small details and just remember the big picture — that you desperately wanted them, and you love them so much. As they get older, they might start asking more complicated questions, so you should prepare yourself to discuss this topic again.

Family Creations is Here For You

Whether you’re a surrogate explaining the situation to your own children or an intended parent raising your child, there are always going to be questions. If you ever feel overwhelmed with how to explain surrogacy to a child, Family Creations is here for you. We’ve gone through this process many times and have the compassion, knowledge, and know-how to help. Reach out to us today to learn more.

by Julia McConnell | Last updated on : February 14, 2023